How do you know???

So, the Oscar season is almost coming to an end. And going through all the great movies, I still go back to last year's winner 'The Blind Side'. A great performance by Sandra Bullock, you could really feel the power and strength of her character, at the same time relate to her sensitivity. It was only when I saw a feature on the real family who opened their doors and hearts for Michael Oher, that I realized that the real Leigh Anne Tuohy was much more more stronger and tougher than her on-screen portrayal.

I can only imagine how much courage it takes, to open your house to a complete stranger and that too, when you have young kids. And I am not talking about courage, just because of what your friends and neighbors would say. But courage to take that chance and be open to someone who really needs you. How many times have we heard about people just coming from troubled neighborhoods and inflicting the same violence elsewhere? Definitely more than once. That is the reason I say it must have taken a lot of courage for her to be able to trust and bring in somebody she didn't know much about.

You hardly know what is going on in your neighbor's mind, leave alone a lonely, hurt, homeless youngster on the street. You do not know if he is vulnerable or violent. Then how do you make such a big decision. And it's not just you who is involved, you are exposing your whole family to the consequences of your instinctive decision. In this violent, gun-wielding world, how do you know to trust somebody??? When do you know that you are bordering away from charity and moving towards danger. And it is not even about trusting the person in front of you. This person could seem completely trustworthy and deserving of being part of a wonderful family. But, you are inviting his past, his acquaintances and you never know what that could bring to you. In the movie too, we see the gangs sometimes threaten Michael and Leigh Anne. And that there, was a scary thought for me.

Who would not like to be a good samaritan and help others in their hour of need? But for me, the difficult part is to know when you are going over the line. But I guess, the way a good person is defined in our history, is somebody who puts other people ahead of themselves. Does that mean you put your safety behind you too??? I don't mean to be too suspicious, but the stories you hear about the increasing crime rate does take a toll on you. I would love to give somebody a home, give them the love they need, give them a family to call their own. Just that, I don't think I am strong enough. I brought strays home all the time, but those were dogs. And let's face it, humans are much more dangerous than the animals. Because humans have much more devious ways of hurting you.

It saddens me to think what some dangerous persons have done to us. Have we, as social animals become incapable of trusting anyone??? How can we expect to be social if we are too cautious and are scared to let our guard down? I don't know what the answers to these questions are, but what I know is, there are thousands of people out there, who need compassion, shelter and open hearts. The glaring fact is that there are needy people around us all the time, and a wary eye is just going to keep us from reaching out to them. I salute the courageous, like Leigh Anne Tuohy and her family, but I have to admit that I am not amongst those people. As much as everybody would like to see fairy tale endings for troubled kids like Michael, it takes more than a loving heart to take that huge step. That does not mean and it should not keep us away from doing what we can, without hampering our own safety. There are many other things we could do, that do not entail exposing ourselves. Working with charities to help homeless kids, trying to be a caregiver, is a very rewarding act. And that is something I could do, before I gather the courage to take bigger steps.

But, what if there were no such kids??? Wouldn't it be nice if there were no dysfunctional families and nobody in need of foster families. It is a far cry from reality, but that is one thing all of us can definitely do, take care  of our families and make sure they never need to rely on the charity of anyone else.